मैं यह सोच भी नहीं सकता था कि भगवान के पास मेरी ज़िंदगी के लिए कोई योजना होगी। मुझे लगता था कि मैंने अपनी ज़िंदगी की योजना खुद बनाई है।
I couldn't imagine, you know, God having a plan for my life. I thought I planned my life out.
I couldn't imagine, you know, God having a plan for my life. I thought I planned my life out.
स्मृति हमें पीछे बुलाती है, रहस्य हमें आगे खींचता है।
Memory calls us back, Mystery draws us forward.
Memory calls us back, Mystery draws us forward.
मैं नशे में था: एक ईसाई और नशे में। ये दोनों चीज़ें साथ मेल नहीं खातीं। लेकिन ऐसा ही हुआ। और अगले दिन, ज़ाहिर है भगवान ने उन प्रार्थनाओं को सुन लिया था और मुझे शराब की लत से मुक्ति दिला दी थी।
I was drunk: Christian and drunk. They just don't go together. But that's what happened. And the next day, obviously God had honored those prayers and healed me of alcoholism.
I was drunk: Christian and drunk. They just don't go together. But that's what happened. And the next day, obviously God had honored those prayers and healed me of alcoholism.
मैं शराब न पीने की पूरी कोशिश कर रहा था। मैं एक-दो दिन निकाल लेता, और फिर मुझसे रहा नहीं जाता। यह बात फैल गई कि 'हैमिल्टन धर्म के रास्ते पर चल पड़ा है।' तो लगभग एक साल तक का वह समय मेरी ज़िंदगी का सबसे दुखों भरा दौर था क्योंकि मैं छुप-छुपकर अब भी शराब पी रहा था। इस सब के लगभग एक साल बाद, एक रात मैं घर आया, और अगले दिन जब मैं जागा तो शराब पीने की इच्छा पूरी तरह खत्म हो चुकी थी।
I was trying my best not to drink. I'd go a day or two, and I just couldn't stand it. It kinda got around that 'Hamilton got religion.' So for about a year, it was the most miserable time of my life because I was secretly still drinking. One night I came home, after about a year of this, and I woke up the next day and the desire was gone.
I was trying my best not to drink. I'd go a day or two, and I just couldn't stand it. It kinda got around that 'Hamilton got religion.' So for about a year, it was the most miserable time of my life because I was secretly still drinking. One night I came home, after about a year of this, and I woke up the next day and the desire was gone.
मुझे नहीं पता था कि मैं क्या कर रहा हूँ, पर इतना जानता था कि मुझे अपनी ज़िंदगी में ईश्वर की ज़रूरत है।
I didn't know what I was doing, but I knew I needed God in my life.
I didn't know what I was doing, but I knew I needed God in my life.
मैं अपने बेडरूम में ही घुटनों के बल बैठ गया। मेरे पास कोई ऐसा पर्चा नहीं था जिस पर लिखा हो कि 'ईश्वर को पाने के लिए प्रार्थना कैसे करें'। मैंने अपनी पूरी ज़िंदगी में कभी ऐसा कोई पर्चा नहीं देखा था। मैंने कभी बाइबिल नहीं पढ़ी थी।
I ended up getting on my knees right there in my bedroom. I didn't have a tract that had, you know, 'here's how you pray to receive Christ' on it. I had never seen a tract in my life. I had never read a Bible.
I ended up getting on my knees right there in my bedroom. I didn't have a tract that had, you know, 'here's how you pray to receive Christ' on it. I had never seen a tract in my life. I had never read a Bible.
मेरी ज़िंदगी और मेरी योजना बहुत अच्छी नहीं थी, पर कम से कम वह मेरी अपनी योजना तो थी। एक वक्त ऐसा आया जब मैं इसे और सहन नहीं कर सका।
My life and my plan wasn't very good, but at least it was my plan. It got to that point that I just couldn't stand it any more.
My life and my plan wasn't very good, but at least it was my plan. It got to that point that I just couldn't stand it any more.
मैं ईश्वर से भाग रहा था, लेकिन मुझे खुद नहीं पता था कि मैं उनसे भाग रहा हूँ। मुझे इस बात की कोई खबर नहीं थी।
I was running from God, but I didn't know I was running from God. I didn't know that.
I was running from God, but I didn't know I was running from God. I didn't know that.
मेरे पिताजी एक अच्छे इंसान थे लेकिन भावनाओं के मामले में मुझसे दूर रहते थे, इसलिए मुझे उस पुरुष स्नेह की तलाश कहीं और करनी पड़ी, जो मुझे अपने एक बहनोई में मिला। और इत्तेफाक से वह शराबी थे।
My dad was a good man but an emotionally absent father, and so I had to look for that male attention somewhere else, and found it in a brother-in-law. He just happened to be an alcoholic.
My dad was a good man but an emotionally absent father, and so I had to look for that male attention somewhere else, and found it in a brother-in-law. He just happened to be an alcoholic.
मुझे ज़रा भी अंदाज़ा नहीं है कि वह पुराना जिम कौन था। ईश्वर ने सचमुच मुझे एक बिल्कुल नया जिम बना दिया है।
I have no clue who that old Jim was. God has certainly transformed me into a different Jim.
I have no clue who that old Jim was. God has certainly transformed me into a different Jim.